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On feeling tired


I’m very, very tired.

I’m a senior in high school, and the last three weeks have been a culmination of the stress I have been accumulating throughout the entire year. There have just been so many things to do; so many rehearsals, so many test to study for, so many projects, so many responsibilities, and such a lack of sleep. I know, I know, that’s the life of an adult. I know it will probably be worse in college. But in the context of my life right now, I’m just pretty darn tired. And all my friends are tired too. It's becoming an epidemic, really.


my best attempt at a calming photo
My main point here is, in the world of blogger-prettiness of which I am attempting to insert myself, tiredness is represented with pictures of cozy tea mugs sitting in fluffy, white comforters or advice about spa products or calming lists of de-stress techniques. And I think that’s lovely. Blogs aren’t always meant to showcase every nitty-gritty detail of every person’s life; many are meant to be sources of inspiration, to be calming and pleasing to read, to be honest yet artistic snapshots of living beautifully through the good and the bad. And I know for many people, this is the reality. Some people, when they’re stressed, stay impeccably organized and controlled.

Despite what I’d prefer, I’m not one of those people. Perhaps it’s because I’m only eighteen and I’m not independent enough yet, or I haven’t learned how to organize my life yet. Perhaps it’s because I have a somewhat scatter-brained, artistic mind that likes to forget things. But right now, when I’m at peak messiness, (when I used a knitting needle to part my hair for the last five days because I couldn’t find my comb, when I fell asleep on the hard, cold floor of the ballet studio and my friends took photos of me, when I stayed up really late studying for a test that I definitely didn’t ace) I’m not going to pretend my life is perfectly squeaky-clean and lovely.

Actually, never mind. My life right now is lovely, but not clean. It’s lovely in a messy, everything-is-thrown-together kind of way. It’s like a really, really crowded antique shop full of thousands of wonderful things but no room to walk without knocking something over. I’m tired but I’m doing everything I love, and I really like that. Sometimes it just comes with the price of chaos.

Maybe at some point I’ll make my bed every morning and arrange my throw pillows perfectly and sip tea out of antique tea cups and remember to use my planner for more than half the week (these are real goals of mine) but at this moment I’m just too. darn. tired. ☺︎

Anybody else feeling moderately stressed lately, or is it just me?

♡ Julia







16 comments

  1. You NAILED this one on the head, Julia. I'm a university student and just last week was the ending week for my semester. That meant revision revision revision revision assignments assignments assignments and exams exams EXAMS. It was terrible, and I was exhausted.

    That was also the reason why I, after an established blogging routine over the year, decided to take a step back from the blogging world and focus on real life. My life was an absolute mess, and it was so good to not worry about making my life pretty for the sake of the internet.

    Also, I'm pretty excited to have found your blog. You write with a very earnest, very realistic voice, and I've followed to see what you come up with in the future. Whatever you do, Julia, I wish you all the best! Cheers! x

    MAY | WWW.THEMAYDEN.COM

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much, that's so kind and really means a lot to me!
      And yes, I agree-- you can't always make your life perfectly pretty. I hope you are finding time to relax now that your semester is over. :)
      x julia

      Delete
  2. Ah man totally hear you on all of this, just feels like we're all running on empty all the time! xx

    moorizZLA

    ReplyDelete
  3. You seem wise beyond your years and remember we never figure it all out, it will always workout though.

    xx Falasha
    Bite My Fashion ll Instagram ll Bloglovin' ll Join the Secret Guide

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much. Yep, that's what I always try to remember!
      x julia

      Delete
  4. Love this post! I always feel so inspired to get my life together (i.e. actually make my bed in the mornings) when I read other blogger's writing, but that just doesn't always happen!

    http://thecourtneydiaries.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sending you major de-stress vibes, lady. :) Good luck wrapping up your senior year- I remember that time being a total mad dash, too!

    -Ashley
    Le Stylo Rouge

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, lady :) Yeah it's been sort of crazy. But also fun. Thank you for reading!

      Delete
  6. You are not alone, and yes you're right about college so you better brace yourself Hahaha I'm in my 3rd year in Uni and I'll give a you a fair warning that when you enter college you might also lose your time in blogging, not just the pretiness, so again prepare yourself. More power dear! xx

    Just Because l youlivealife.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah I'm kind of expecting that, college sounds pretty crazy. Thanks for the warning :)

      Delete
  7. I can totally relate to this article! Very well written <3

    Love,
    Marta
    www.martamademoiselle.com

    ReplyDelete

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About me
I’m a 19-year old college student who’s still very much “in bluhm” (heh) but I’m figuring it out as I go, laptop in hand.
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