I’m very, very tired.
I’m a senior in high school, and the last three weeks have been a culmination of the stress I have been accumulating throughout the entire year. There have just been so many things to do; so many rehearsals, so many test to study for, so many projects, so many responsibilities, and such a lack of sleep. I know, I know, that’s the life of an adult. I know it will probably be worse in college. But in the context of my life right now, I’m just pretty darn tired. And all my friends are tired too. It's becoming an epidemic, really.
|my best attempt at a calming photo|
Despite what I’d prefer, I’m not one of those people. Perhaps it’s because I’m only eighteen and I’m not independent enough yet, or I haven’t learned how to organize my life yet. Perhaps it’s because I have a somewhat scatter-brained, artistic mind that likes to forget things. But right now, when I’m at peak messiness, (when I used a knitting needle to part my hair for the last five days because I couldn’t find my comb, when I fell asleep on the hard, cold floor of the ballet studio and my friends took photos of me, when I stayed up really late studying for a test that I definitely didn’t ace) I’m not going to pretend my life is perfectly squeaky-clean and lovely.
Actually, never mind. My life right now is lovely, but not clean. It’s lovely in a messy, everything-is-thrown-together kind of way. It’s like a really, really crowded antique shop full of thousands of wonderful things but no room to walk without knocking something over. I’m tired but I’m doing everything I love, and I really like that. Sometimes it just comes with the price of chaos.
Maybe at some point I’ll make my bed every morning and arrange my throw pillows perfectly and sip tea out of antique tea cups and remember to use my planner for more than half the week (these are real goals of mine) but at this moment I’m just too. darn. tired. ☺︎
Anybody else feeling moderately stressed lately, or is it just me?