- Writing requires time. Time is very precious, as of now. And by 'very precious', I mean I have very little of it. But hey, I'm not here to complain. I just need to find the time.
- I have a bunch of jumbled ideas of things I want to write, how I want my blog to be, how I'm going to improve social media, and how I'm going to generally be a better blogger. Tons of ideas. Multiple google docs full. The problem with ideas, though, is the making-them-real part. It doesn't help that a bunch of my ideas don't really go together, or aren't really realistic for where I am yet, or require a bunch more figuring-out.
I don't think procrastination is my issue right now, because I really, really want to do all the stuff that I'm trying to do. And I don't think time is 100% of the problem, because people can always find time if they really want to try. The problem with getting stuff done lies in the fuzzy area between the many ideas and the final product. That's where stuff gets lost. And, annoyingly, I'm just sitting there, in the middle of it all, looking around at this huge, unorganized pile of ingredients. Eggs, milk, sugar, oil, tablespoons, cups, you name it. Ideas. Why can't I just get it all done? Am I lazy? Na. It isn't a problem of laziness if you don't even have a recipe. (I think) I have the will power, (I think) I have the determination, (I think) I have the time, but I need to get organized. I need to establish a new routine. I need to figure out where to start, what ingredient to put in first, or what idea to figure out.
Some people can cook without a recipe, sure.
But I am not one of those people.
(Sorry about the random cooking metaphor. That probably wasn't my best decision, but I'm just going with it. )
College is the culprit, I think. I'm in a whole new place, with new people, and a new (freaking weird) schedule. I haven't learned how to optimize my time yet, how to optimize my mind in the context of this new environment, or how to deal with my tiredness. I NEED TO ESTABLISH A ROUTINE.
Basically, my brain is a crazy mush of blogging ideas, responsibilities, and thoughts after thoughts after thoughts. Pushing past all my "wait before I write this blog I need to do *insert something important!*" was a struggle. Coming up with something to write about for this post was a struggle, because somehow nothing in my many lists sounded fitting for right now. Finding time to write this post itself was a tad bit of a challenge, but hey, this is what I signed up for. And lastly, the biggest challenge of them all, was finding a way to wrap this blog up.
I have no conclusion for you, is basically what I'm saying.
I love to write thoughtful, deep blog posts in which I talk about a problem, a way of thinking, or a certain feeling, and then tie it up with a pretty bow and say "this is what I learned," or "here's a different, better perspective" or "here's what you've gotta do."
But I don't know how to organize my life, how to establish a routine that I can stick to, or how not to feel like I'm constantly surrounded by a halo of brain-clutter. I'm working on it, though. In fact, right after pressing "publish" on this blog I'm going to sit down with a yellow legal pad and try to make sense of the mess. I'm going to try to make a routine so that I have time for everything. I'm going to try and identify all the brain-clutter, and get it sorted into it's proper spot. I'm going to try to bake a cake out of my beautiful, busy, unorganized thoughts.
I'll let you know what I figure out. ;)
P.S. Any future posts marked "thought of the day" will probably be like this. By "this" I mean brief, less organized, and less conclusive life musings. I can't always figure everything out in time to write a pretty blog post about it. But confusion can also be a pretty good writing motivation, just in a different way.
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